


Where your heart lingers

by struckbylarry



Category: Monsta X (Band)
Genre: Anal Fingering, Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Eventual Smut, M/M, Mention of blackmail, Mutual Masturbation, Rimming, not between them, post disbandment
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-03-16
Updated: 2021-03-16
Packaged: 2021-03-24 18:00:58
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 10,863
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/30076131
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/struckbylarry/pseuds/struckbylarry
Summary: "“I can’t be with you, don’t you get it?”“No, Hoseok, I don’t, I really don’t.”"Hoseok and Kihyun meet after years of being apart from each other.
Relationships: Lee Hoseok | Wonho/Yoo Kihyun
Comments: 4
Kudos: 10





	1. Past and present meet

**Author's Note:**

> I can't believe I'm posting this. This work has been on my drafts for more than two years and is finally seeing the light of the day. This fic is so special to me because Kiho is my favorite Monsta X pairing and it will always be and I feel very happy to give life to them in this work (It's angst but angst makes me happy, can you blame me?)
> 
> I think I should warn again there is mention of someone blackmailing Hoseok, but I don't dwell much in this aspect. Explicit content will be tagged accordinly once I post it, until then I hope you enjoy what I created here. Also, in this world October 19 never happened, they disbanded as 7 after years and years together. Great reading for everyone!
> 
> No beta, we just die lol but if someone finds a mistake feel free to correct me.

**CHAPTER 1: Past and present meet**

It was a typical Sunday at Kihyun’s house, as typical as it could be with his new solo album coming soon. He was working on his first full album for the past six months. Since Monsta X disbanded and another thing he would rather not talk about also ended, he started to write songs, because of the raging need to pour all of his feelings of heartbreak somewhere, other than Minhyuk’s ears.

He was eating his breakfast as fast as he could just by habit. It takes some time to break out of the fast-paced life he had with his six best friends. The minute he woke up a decision was made, he would spend the day in bed. He deserved a little bit of rest and that’s what he did, or almost. 3 hours into his resting day Minhyuk called.

“Kihyun-ah, let’s go out today!”

“No way, I’m going to spend the rest of the day in bed, watching movies. I need to watch About Time again. It’s been so long since I watched it”.

“Oh no, you’re not staying home. You have seen it last month and we haven’t seen each other in ages”.

“Minhyuk, you saw me two weeks ago, do you love me that much?”.

“Love? No one said anything about love, this is a purely business relationship, in which I have to take care of you like you are an old man”.

“Hey! I have been taking care of you for 15 years, I grew 10 years older every year because of you”, Kihyun said scoffing and trying to not laugh because of the whole convo they were having.

“Back to the subject, don’t make me talk about other things to distract me”

“I would never”, Kihyun said smiling.

“Yeah, right. Can you please go out with me? Pretty please?

“Since when do you beg me for things? Something smells fishy, what are you up to, Minhyuk?”.

“What? Can’t I just want to have quality time with my best friend?”

“Ok, sure...you can, but where are we going?”

“It’s a surprise!”, Minhyuk said with the most cheerful voice possible.

“You know I don’t like surprises!”, Kihyun said, a little exasperated.

“You’re gonna love this one, he-I mean, the place is great, we’re going to have so much fun”.

“I’m gonna go just because you sound so excited, but it doesn’t mean I’m liking this.

“Wonderful! I’ll be at your place at 7. Try to look handsome, bye.”, Minhyuk said hurriedly. 

“Wait...I”, but he had already hung up. Kihyun kept thinking about why his friend would ask him to look handsome. He better not be trying to set him up on some sort of blind date.

~~~//~~~

It was close to 7. Kihyun had decided to put on his best clothes. In the back of his mind, he remembered how much Hoseok liked when he wore this outfit, but he told himself that this night had nothing to do with his ex, he wouldn’t think about it tonight.

When Minhyuk arrived to pick him up he was going back and forth the living room and his bedroom, thinking he probably forgot something. Minhyuk had the keys to his house so he just let himself in.

“Hey there control freak, calm down, it’s just one night, not one month out.”, Kihyun opened his mouth preparing to say something but didn’t even get to start. “Don’t even try to say you’re not nervous, I know how you are”.

“I’m just...It’s been so long since I’ve gone out like this, I feel like a teenager going out for the first time”.

“Relax Ki, It’s not like you’re going on a blind date or anything like that, I wouldn’t be that crazy”, He said laughing and not looking at his friend’s face.

“You’re not looking at me while you say that, you’re lying”

“Stop making up scenarios in your head and let’s go”, Minhyuk said taking Kihyun’s left hand in his to take him out of the house before he changed his mind.

~~//~~

They got to the place really quick, it was a bar Kihyun had seen in passing but never thought of going in. It had NorthStars written in big neon letters at the front, which made it impossible to not notice the place. When they finally got in Kihyun thought it was the most beautiful bar he had ever seen, it was North Pole-themed, the ceiling looked like the most beautiful sky, full of lights that felt like stars, the walls were pretty ice white with beautiful drawings of polar bears. Kihyun thought that he would like to know the artist who did them to say how beautiful they were.

He was so distracted that he didn’t even realize when they found their table and Minhyuk said, “I have a surprise, please don’t kill me?”.

“What are you talking about Min-”

He couldn’t believe what he was seeing, there he was, his ex-boyfriend, his group member, best friend (Minhyuk would beg to differ on this one), and the love of his life seating, looking as beautiful as ever, with that smile he missed so much. He froze. Kihyun felt like he could run or hug him at any moment, any of those options could be disastrous, so he just stood there, waiting for something, anything to happen. And something certainly happened.

“Hi”, Hoseok said, awkwardly offering his hand for Kihyun to shake.

When their hands touched they both looked at each other for one mere second and diverted their eyes, too embarrassed to even look at each other while touching. Kihyun couldn’t help but feel good while touching Hoseok again, after so many months it was like he was starved for something only he could give. He knew Hoseok didn’t feel the same anymore, he made it clear the last time they spoke, but he couldn’t help but feel what he had always felt for the older man. 

“Uh...Hi, How...you know? Stuff…”

Kihyun was beating himself up (and Minhyuk in his imagination, for putting him in that situation) for not being able to start a simple conversation with someone he, at some point, knew like the back of his hand.

Hoseok laughed shyly at Kihyun’s awkwardness, realizing they were still holding hands and taking his back a little abruptly and answering him.

“I’ve been good, I have been working on my music a lot and yeah, I’m back in Seoul to finish it”

“Ok, I guess it’s my time to go, I will go over there and drink something, bye”, in the middle of the phrase Minhyuk had already gone away, leaving Kihyun alone with Hoseok. He cursed Minhyuk under his breath, swearing he would get to him later and make him explain himself.

“What did you say?”, Hoseok spoke a little louder.

“Oh, nothing, just wanting to murder Minhyuk, nothing new”

Hoseok started to laugh because of his sincerity, he had almost forgotten how straight to the point Kihyun could be. It was the laugh that Kihyun remembered, the one where he would close his eyes and laugh with his entire body, automatically looking for someone to slap because it was that funny.

“I missed it”, the phrase slipping out of Kihyun’s mouth without him realizing it.

“What did you miss?”

Kihyun figured it was useless to try to hide it and embarrass himself even more.

“Your laugh”, he said looking down at his hands, still afraid it was too much.

“And I missed you”.

Kihyun was taken by surprise by the statement, it’s not like he didn’t believe it, after all, they were friends for many years, before being boyfriends. It was the way Hoseok said, breathy and with something else lingering on it. His voice sounded just like it did when they were dating and had to spend time apart, which everyone and their mothers knew was like torture to them. He couldn’t allow himself to think Hoseok still loved him, he just couldn’t.

“I’m so sorry Kihyunni- I...Kihyun, I don’t want to say stuff like that and not explain myself...can we talk somewhere else? It’s starting to get too crowded here and I don’t think it’s the best place for it, but of course, you can refuse it, I mean I only made you angry and sad all this me, you didn’t even need to be talking to me right n-”

“Hoseok hyung, stop, please. It’s ok, we can talk”, Kihyun wasn’t even sure of what he was doing but he knew he couldn’t just leave now, the thought of leaving his side right now was too saddening, he needed to do that, even if it was to get some closure. Maybe Minhyuk’s scheming would be a good thing for him after all, but he would never admit it to his friend. 

“Oh thank god, Minhyuk said I should prepare myself for-”, he suddenly stopped himself, realizing he probably shouldn’t talk about this right now.

“So Minhyuk has been talking behind my back? I see how it is”.

“He was just trying to help us, please don’t be mad at him”, Hoseok said doing his best puppy face, which he didn’t even realize he was doing, most of the time he did it.

“I’m not...I mean, I am, because he should have told me what was going on but I know why he did things his way like always. Don’t tell him, but well...he kinda knows me really well”, Kihyun was smiling, forgetting the parent trap he was in for a second. Well, it’s not like he could be mad at him for too long, he never made it to more than one week.

“Yeah, that’s our Minhyukie, always the know it all and trying to run the show”, he said smiling right back at Kihyun.

It felt so easy to go back to smiling at each other because of Minhyuk’s antics, like when they were still a group, for a few seconds it was a normal day.

“Yeah...should we get going then?”

“Yes, yes. Is it ok for you if we go to my house?”

Kihyun was a little taken aback by the question. He had never gone to Hoseok’s house for obvious reasons and the thought of going to such an intimate place where they had no memories together made him feel a little sad.

“Of course, we can go, it will be fun to get to know your place and see how messy it is”.

“Hey! I’m not that messy”, Hoseok said trying to hold his laugh.

“I have proof and I can show it to the world”.

“Our fans kind of already know how much of a mess we all are, they love us anyway”

“They do, they’re pretty special”.They couldn’t help but smile at each other thinking about the good times they had with fans since their debut.

They managed to get a taxi as soon as they got out of the bar. Both of them got on the back seat as they used to do. It would be too awkward to change sits now that they were already in the car so they just had a silent mutual agreement that a taxi wasn’t the place to talk about whatever they would talk about. It was funny that even in that situation they seemed to be in sync with each other. Kihyun could feel his hands sweating all the way to Hoseok’s house, he felt stupid for being so nervous, it was just Hoseok, his friend for years. His best friend or kind of not anymore. Everything was confusing and he felt like running away for a moment but Hoseok’s presence was so strong and real right by his side, he knew he couldn’t even get himself to try.

Time went by slow and fast at the same time, Kihyun was feeling like he had drunk something, like maybe none of what was happening was real, but it was. When they got to Hoseok’s place and finally go through the front door it reminded him that the last time he got into a house it was theirs. That thought hurt like most of the things relating to Hoseok did these days.

“Your home is beautiful”

“Thank you, I’m not as good with decorating as you are but I did my best”

“You did hyung, it looks amazing.”

They knew they were just doing small talk before they started actually talking about everything that happened. Or at least something deeper than the house decoration. Kihyun was afraid that night might be the last night he would see Hoseok once again. It was not like they hadn't met at birthdays and company stuff the last two years, they had, but those were always brief meetings, nothing like what was happening tonight.

“Do you want anything to eat? To drink?”, Hoseok asked, clearly fidgeting with his hands.

“No, thank you, I’m already full, I ate a lot before going to the bar.”

“Let me guess...chicken?”

Kihyun laughed, some things never changed.

“Yeah, you still know it.”

“Of course I do.” A few seconds passed and Kihyun knew it was happening. No, there was no escape anymore.

“Can we start talking? I have so much to say and maybe you do too and want to say something first, that would be ok for me.” Hoseok said without taking a single breath.

“No...it’s fine. You can start.”

“Uh... ok, let’s sit”, the older man said gesturing to the brown sofa near them.

They sat, facing each other. The atmosphere was heavy, it felt like there was nothing else in the world at this moment, if there was any noise outside they wouldn’t hear. It was just Hoseok and Kihyun, side by side, facing each other, alone, for the very first time in two years. It was a lot, for both of them.

“Ki, I don’t even know If I’m allowed you to call you that anymore…”, Kihyun motioned for him to keep going, Hoseok sighed and kept talking, “I know I hurt you a lot and I won’t ask for forgiveness, that is only yours to give if you want, but I think I owe it to you and to myself to be completely honest. I will never forget what I did that night, It was the worst night of my life and I would take it all back If I could but I can’t and It hurts…”

-

**_2 YEARS AGO._ **

_ “Ki, we need to talk”, Hoseok said, looking lost and sad. In all the years they have been together, Kihyun had never seen him like that. He felt his stomach turning around, something was very wrong. _

_ “I can’t live like this anymore, this is too much, I can’t love you, I can’t I…”, Hoseok started to cry, not being able to finish what he was trying to say. _

_ “Hoseokie? What happened? Please tell me, I’m gonna help you with whatever you need, you don’t even need to tell me anything right now, just say what you need, I’ll do it.” Kihyun was desperate to give any kind of comfort to his boyfriend. _

_ “I can’t be with you, don’t you get it?” _

_ “No, Hoseok, I don’t, I really don’t.” _

_ Kihyun was past the point of his stomach dropping. He was full-on feeling sick now. _

_ “I...Someone blackmailed me ok...They made me pay a shit ton of money just so a photo of us kissing won’t leak and I know you’re ready to come out but I’m not and I don’t know If I will ever be so I can’t love you anymore…” _

_ Hoseok was out of breath, his tears dropping continuously. _

_ “Did you talk to the company? We can get through this, please Hoseok hyung we can do this together, you know I would never force you to do anything and I’m gonna do everything I can to protect you.” _

_ Hoseok sighed, his eyes dropping to the floor. _

_ “I don’t...I didn’t talk to the company. I’m just tired Kihyunnie and I can’t continue dragging you with me when I’m spiraling like this. You will never get what you need from me.” _

_ Kihyun dropped to his knees, losing the strength in his legs.  _

_ “Hoseokie, I have everything I need right here with you, I don’t need anything else. Hyung, how can’t you see this?”, he was gripping tightly on Hoseok’s hands, unconsciously thinking that maybe If the older one was reminded of his touch he would change his mind. _

_ It didn’t. Hoseok was sure about his decision. _

_ “We have to end things, you need to find someone that’s going to love you like you deserve. One that’s not a coward like me.” _

_ “Stop Hoseok. Stop right now, you can’t do this in the state you are in. You can’t do this to us after everything we’ve been through to be together” _

_ “No, Kihyunn-Kihyun, there’s no other way” _

_ “Tell me you don’t love me then. It’s the only reason our relationship could not work out anymore” _

_ Hoseok froze. _

_ “Tell me and I’ll let you go if this is what you want.” _

_ “I…”, Kihyun was internally praying that Hoseok couldn’t mutter those words. Because he knew the moment he did everything would change. _

_ “I don’t love you anymore”, Hoseok said, with tears streaming down his face harder than ever. Not daring to take a glance to see Kihyun’s reaction. _

**_END OF FLASHBACK_ **

“Just tell me how you feel and we can go from there. It’s all I ever wanted from you. I won’t lie, I resented you for a long time after that night, but as time passed I just wanted some closure.”

“Ok, I’ll try...you know I was freaking out that night. I really wasn’t in my right mind after being threatened like that and it’s not an excuse to break up with you like I did but I really think that at the time I wasn’t ready to accept who I was, I was too focused on protecting the image I thought I should have and I didn’t realize I was destroying who I was by doing that, I didn’t know how to be kind to myself and you got caught in the middle of that. I need you to know I was never ashamed of you, this happened because of my internal struggles and I know I should have talked to you at the time and not just pretend I was fine but I was stubborn…”

Hoseok took a long breath. Remembering that time hurt so much.

“I wanted to take things in my hands and not let anyone help me. I didn’t want you to be hurt when everything blew up...and I tried to forget you, I really did. I thought everything would turn out to be better eventually if we were apart but things don’t always go as we want don’t they?”, Hoseok had a tired look on his eyes, the kind of look Kihyun had only seen one time, in that one night years ago. It pained him a great deal to see him like this.

“Everywhere I looked you were there, even a simple walk by the Han River reminded me of you because it brought memories of us walking side by side when we were trainees and how we would talk about the future we wanted for ourselves. We weren't even together at the time and we were already talking about forever”, Hoseok let out a hollow laugh, “of course we were, I was in love with you way before I knew, it has always been there, you know that.” Hoseok was on the verge of crying and Kihyun reached for his face, finally letting himself touch the face that never left his dreams. 

“I know,” He said, just letting himself feel that soft skin that only Hoseok had, he was sure of it. “I knew we had something special from the moment I met you at the company, we were so young and didn’t know what we were doing and I know it was a lot of pressure, I don’t blame you for feeling the way you felt at the time...I just wish you would have talked to me…”

“I know, I’m sorry, I was wrong and I can see that now so clearly. I know you would understand my fear because you know me like no one else does, even today, after all this time you understand me, Kihyunie, you really do.”

Kihyun was caressing his cheeks now, they were closer than they expected to be, looking right into each other's eyes. It was always like this with them. Their bodies grew naturally close like magnets.

Hoseok closed his eyes. Kihyun had to fight the urge to kiss him, to remember how soft his lips were. It’s not something he could actually forget, he remembered every detail of Hoseok, from his lips to his habits, to the look he had only for him. He was completely engraved in his heart. 

He didn’t kiss him but the urge to touch was bigger than any sense of self-preservation he could have, so he hugged him. It did not feel painful like he thought it would. It felt like coming home. Like they matched. Any awkwardness they felt earlier suddenly melt away. They hugged for a long time, without saying anything, only feeling the warmth they had missed but didn’t dare to seek out till that moment.

Hoseok finally let his tears stream down his face, without caring about how he looked like right now. He never had to with Kihyun. 

“It’s ok Hoseok-ah, I’m here”, Kihyun said, as his tears started to fall too, while he pressed himself into Hoseok’s chest. 

It was cathartic.

Pure emotion overflowing from them and dropping to their skins, crystal clear, raw.

After some time they reluctantly released themselves from each other’s arms. 

“It’s better If I go, It’s getting late,” Kihyun said. 

Hoseok was trying to dry his tears with his shirt. Kihyun thought he looked cute and smiled at him.

“What?”, Hoseok asked, feeling confused.

“You look like a kid when you do that, it’s funny”.

“Don’t make fun of me, I opened up my heart to you.”

“Hey, I wasn’t trying to…” Kihyun was at a loss for words, which was not very common.

“Kihyunie, I’m kidding, It’s fine, I know I do, I’m not the fake maknae for nothing.” He said giving a cheeky smile. He was even cuter when he smiled, Kihyun knew that, but looking at him so close to his face made everything brighter and prettier.

“I really have to go, Hyung. I have to be at the studio early and...you know”, He gestured vaguely.

“I know”, Hoseok gave him the understanding smile he knew so well. “We still have things to talk about and I don’t know If you want it but If you do...can we be friends again?”

“I...yeah, sure”, Kihyun agreed with a hint of uncertainty in his voice, not because he was against it, but because he didn’t know if he could ever be just friends with Hoseok. Them being together or not, they were never just friends, right from the start.

Kihyun was about to get up when Hoseok took one of his hands. They looked at each other for a second before Hoseok started talking.

“You can stay if you want, It’s closer to the studio and I have a guest bedroom.”

Kihyun froze. It’s been a while since he spent so much time alone with Hoseok. Not that he thought they would do anything other than sleeping. He definitely wasn’t thinking about that.

“It’s ok if you’re not comfortable doing it, Kihyunie. It was just a suggestion.”

“No...I want to...I mean it is closer to the studio.”

Kihyun knew why he accepted to stay but he decided he was just not going to think about this right now. 

Suddenly they realized they were still holding hands. Neither of them wanted to let go first but they had to do it eventually. Kihyun allowed himself a few seconds more of touching before letting go.

“We should go to sleep, I’m sure you have things to do tomorrow too, you should get some rest.” Kihyun always had the urge to take care of him, no matter what. He frequently asked Minhyuk how Hoseok was doing, if he was sleeping and eating well, he hoped Minhyuk hadn’t said anything about this, it was no big deal, but he just didn’t want Hoseok to know.

“Yeah, the guest bedroom is at the end of the hall. There’s towels and everything you need. Anything you need you call for me, I’ll probably still up anyways.”

Kihyun gave Hoseok that look he always gave when he thought he was exhausting himself from working too much. It was not a disapproving look, it was an “I’m worried about you, please take care of yourself.” Hoseok had seen it a million times before, but now it hit differently. He felt even more comforted by it. “Maybe he still cares about me as he did then”, passed through his head as a fleeting thought, that he dismissed immediately, he wouldn’t be having any expectations, after all, he decided to talk to Kihyun only to make amends for his mistakes.

“It’s ok, I’m sure I’ll be fine.” Kihyun started to walk out of the living room, he was halfway through the hall when Hoseok called for him.

“Hey, Kihyunnie!”

“Yeah?” Kihyun sounded softer than he had intended.

“Good luck in the studio tomorrow. I mean, you don’t even need luck, you were born talented, everyone in the world knows that but,” Hoseok was sure the nervousness was showing in his voice. “I just wanted to say I’m proud of you, I have always been.”

Kihyun didn’t know what to say to that. He was pretty confident in his skills, even more so with the years of experience he had. He knew he was good, amazing even. Hearing that from the person he loved the most in his entire life was entirely different. He wishes it wasn’t, because he was still hurting, but it was. Part of him felt happy, euphoric even, he had missed these simple acts of affection, however, there was a part of him that felt sad, knowing that those sweet words didn’t come from his lover, his best friend. Not anymore.

“Thank you Hoseokie Hyung.” It was all he could say right now, before turning away to go to bed, which didn’t even begin to cover what he was feeling right now. He slipped a little bit when calling him Hoseokie, old habits didn’t die that easily. He saw what that did to Hoseok, he was surprised. In a good way. His eyes were back to the ones he knew for a few seconds, full of life and love. Magical. It was what he used to say to him when they were alone in their bed, in one of those cold nights that all that mattered was having their bodies touching from head to toe, their eyes locked on each other.

**_5 YEARS AGO._ **

_ “Hoseok hyung, come to bed right now or I will replace you with all these pillows, I’m warning you, they will become my one and only, It’s over for you.” _

_ “No!” Hoseok shouted from the bathroom. “I’m coming, I won’t let them steal you from me, I will fight them if I have to.” _

_ “Hyung, you wouldn’t hurt a fly, I hardly think you have a chance,” Kihyun said trying to suppress the laugh that was coming any second now. _

_ “Hey, I can fight. Remember that time I fought all those mosquitoes, they got to know my fury.” _

_ “Yeah, alright you’re the mosquito warrior, now come to bed you big baby,” Kihyun said, finally letting his laugh come out. Hoseok was almost distracted by the laugh he loved so much. _

_ “Who’s the big baby here? Not me. You are.” Hoseok pouted, in his most convincing 5-year-old act. _

_ “I hate to say it, but I’m not big, that’s one thing I’m not.” Hoseok was the only one that could make him say he was short. _

_ “Are you sure?” Hoseok raised one eyebrow, changing the look of his face completely.  _

_ Kihyun took a few seconds to catch on. _

_ “You’re such a pervert, come here I’m gonna give you a lesson!” _

_ “Can’t wait for it!” Hoseok said laughing, while he ran to get under the covers, positioning himself as close to Kihyun as he could, there was not an inch of space separating them. _

_ “Where’s my lesson Kiki?” Hoseok winked at him. _

_ “Here it is.” Kihyun stared at his boyfriend’s eyes for a moment, putting one of his hands on Hoseok’s shoulders and softly caressing it. His face changed to a mischievous one and before Hoseok could realize what was happening Kihyun started tickling him, right where he knew Hoseok would feel it instantly. The younger man had barely touched Hoseok’s armpits and he was already laughing uncontrollably. His laugh filling the room, but mostly Kihyun’s heart. It was his favorite sound since the very first moment he heard it. _

_ “Stop, Kihyunie I can’t take this I,” He tried to say between his uncontrollable laugh. Kihyun took pity on his boyfriend and finally stopped. _

_ “Did you learn your lesson, Hyung?” Kihyun asked while smiling. _

_ “I did, I learned that you are a tease.” Hoseok pouted again. Why did he have to look so cute when he pouted? It wasn’t fair.  _

_ “Oh, I am the tease in this relationship? Right, whatever you say hyung.” Kihyun put his hand through his boyfriend’s freshly washed hair, gently caressing it. One time when they went to South America for a tour he learned a word for what he was doing, while they were in Brazil. The word was “cafuné”. He never forgot it because he liked to have a name for one of his favorite things to do when he was with his boyfriend. He remembered teaching the word to Hoseok right away after he learned it and how Hoseok kept repeating it to everyone he saw the entire day. He was adorable. Kihyun couldn’t stop smiling, as he repeatedly did when Hoseok was around. _

_ Kihyun kept doing it while looking right into Hoseok’s eyes. God, his eyes were so pretty. The most magical thing he had ever seen. _

_ “Did you know you are magical, hyung?” _

_ “I am?” His eyes were sparkling. Kihyun didn’t know someone’s eyes could sparkle till he met Hoseok. _

_ “Yes. Your eyes are magical, I can see everything in them. I can see the joy you have just for being alive, I can see your heart and how it’s so open and pure and I can see your love for me, every time I see your eyes they remind me I’m alive and I have you, sweetheart.” _

_ At this point, Hoseok was crying. He felt so loved, here in the embrace of the love of his life, the safest place he knew. _

_ Kihyun was wiping his tears very delicately with his fingers, letting him feel all the emotions he needed to. That was how it was with them, they just understood each other. _

_ That night they went to sleep loving each other even more, anchored to each other in a way that was only theirs. _

**_END OF FLASHBACK_ **


	2. Found again

**CHAPTER 2: Found again**

Kihyun woke up to the familiar sound of his alarm. He was one of those people that would get up as soon as it started to ring. Hyungwon always said he had to be another species to do that so easily. 

He got up, still a little drowsy, taking a few seconds to take in where he was. That was not his apartment. Oh...he slept at Hoseok’s house. Last night came rushing into his thoughts. He had properly spoken to Hoseok, for the first time in two years. As the memories of their shared life came to his mind, his feelings for his hyung came together, piercing through him, everything consumed by what Kihyun knew he couldn’t keep from himself anymore.

He still loved Hoseok. Desperately so. 

Damn it. He had no idea how he would deal with this, now that he was back on speaking terms with Hoseok. What a mess.

Well, he was going to deal with this later. Now he just had to - possibly - go through breakfast with the love of his life, without saying anything he would regret later. Easy.

He was going to take a shower, but then realized he had no clothes to put on after. He got out of the room, looking for Hoseok. He didn’t have to look for long, his hyung was already at the kitchen, making breakfast (and it smelt amazing).

He made a noise, trying to get Hoseok’s attention. He didn’t seem to hear, so Kihyun gave up on the subtlety.

“Hyung!” He half-shouted.

Hoseok finally looked up. Looking beautiful. How could he be so beautiful at this time in the morning? Kihyun was truly being tested. 

“Oh, hi Kihyunnie.” He said giving his biggest smile. All white teeth and pretty lips. For a moment Kihyun almost forgot he was not waking up to that smile every day. 

He woke up from his trance.

“Hi,” He said shyly. What the hell, why was he being like this? It was just Hoseok. They have known each other for too many years to count.

“Want some breakfast? It’s almost ready. I knew you would wake up early so I thought I should cook you something.”

“Oh, hyung,” He paused, just admiring the man before his eyes. “I would love to but first I would like to take a shower and since I didn’t know I would sleep here last night I don’t really… have anything. Can you help me?” He looked down, waiting for an answer.

“Of course Kihyunnie. My clothes are too big for you but I think we can find something. Let’s go find it in my room!”

“Your r-oom?” So now he was stuttering too. Great. 

“Yeah. That’s where my clothes are bab-Kihyun.”

The almost slip out of the endearment term didn’t go unnoticed to either of them. Kihyun had to suppress a smile upon hearing it.

“Yeah, let’s go.”

The room was just like he imagined it would be. It screamed Hoseok in all the places he looked, which made it feel like home, even if Kihyun didn’t want to admit it to himself.

“There, you can try and find something that fits you.” Hoseok pointed to the white wardrobe in the room.

Kihyun opened the door and started to look for something. He was going through shirts and sweaters and he saw something yellow. It looked familiar. 

He took the yellow fabric into his hands to see what it was.

Oh.

It was the yellow cardigan Hoseok had gifted him one time, for his birthday. He thought he had lost it.

“Did you keep it?” Kihyun said, taking his eyes off the cardigan and looking at Hoseok.

Hoseok looked down.

“When I...when I moved I found it in the middle of my stuff and intended to give it back to you, but I never found the right moment to do it. I’m sorry I should have just told someone to give it to you.”

“No, It’s ok. I just thought I lost it.”

“Yeah...no. It was always here.” Hoseok looked up, right into Kihyun’s eyes.

Somehow it felt like they were already talking about something else.

“Well, I’m happy I found it. I have something to put on now. I’m gonna go take a shower real quick.”

“I’m gonna wait for you with breakfast. You can use my bathroom if you want since you’re already here.”

“Yeah? Ok, I will.”

After Hoseok got out of the room he couldn’t help but look around for a little bit, commit to memory every little detail that was so Hoseok. The bed looked so cozy, he could imagine Hoseok laying there. It’s not that he wanted to, it was inevitable when had seen Lee Hoseok on a bed so many times before.

The yellow cardigan was still in his hands. He brought it close to his face. It had Hoseok’s scent now. God, he missed it. Even just that could take him back to so many memories.

Ok, he needed to hurry up. Daydreaming with a cardigan wouldn't get him anywhere. He showered as fast as he could, trying to - in vain - wash his worries away. When Kihyun got out of the bathroom his yellow cardigan and the rest of the clothes he needed were laid out on the bed. 

Could Hoseok be a little less thoughtful? He was trying to be less hopelessly in love.

He put on the clothes, trying to ignore Hoseok’s smell, coming from everywhere - mostly from the clothes - which was, oh, a big challenge. Another smell started to get his attention. Breakfast. He didn’t realize how hungry he was with everything that was happening.

When Kihyun got to the kitchen the table was all set and Hoseok was waiting for him while looking at something on his phone. It reminded him of when he had to ask Hoseok to stop working for a bit, which always ended up with Kihyun bribing him with kisses.

Hoseok saw him staring and Kihyun looked down immediately.

“Oh, Kihyunnie, you’re here. Please come, I waited for you because I know you like company when eating.”

“Thank you, you didn’t have to.”

“Shh, just sit and eat as much as you want. I tried to cook some of your favorite dishes.”

“Fried chicken? No way!”

“Yes, I know it cheers you up,” Hoseok said smiling.

Kihyun saw that beautiful smile and his first reaction was going forward to kiss Hoseok as he did in the past when he got cheerful by something his ex-boyfriend did. He stopped midway when he saw what he was doing, panicking and thinking if Hoseok realized what was happening. If he did, he was polite enough to not say anything.

“So hyung, have you been writing?”, Kihyun asked to change the subject but also because he had always been interested in his hyung’s music and he missed listening to him talk about what he loved the most.

“Yes! I have been writing so much, there’s this song I think monbebes are gonna like, but I’m not sure yet, I have to twist it a little more. I could use some opinion.”

Kihyun couldn’t help but think he was being invited to Hoseok’s studio. Maybe not.

“Monbebes love everything you write hyung, you have always put your soul into every single piece of music you create and they feel it.”

“You think so?”, Hoseok’s eyes were full of joy, so dazzling.

“Yeah, everyone feels it. I feel it…you know it, I have always been in love with your music and...”, Kihyun cut himself off but he knew Hoseok knew what he was going to say.

“I know. I miss listening to your endless opinions and making you record all of my demos.”

“Endless opinions, huh?”, Kihyun smirked.

“Well yeah, you got a lot to say,” Hoseok added laughing.

Kihyun nodded in agreement and laughed along with Hoseok. 

This was them. Teasing. Laughing. Just being together. 

Maybe everything was going to be ok, even it wasn’t in the way Kihyun wished it was. Being in Hoseok’s life was enough.

They finished their breakfast in a good mood, playing along with each other. Kihyun definitely didn’t want to leave but he thought he had overstayed already.

“Hyung, I better go, I have to record some vocals today.”

“Yeah, of course, can’t wait to hear what you’re cooking up in that studio.”

“You could come to listen to it someday.”

Wait, why was he inviting him so soon? It probably sounded desperate. 

“Yes! I would be happy to!” Hoseok was eager to accept, not showing an ounce of discomfort, as kind as ever.

“Ok, I will kakao you...do you still have the same number?

“I do.”

“Great. I really have to go now.”

“Wait,” Hoseok grabbed Kihyun’s hand and letting it go quickly, realizing they didn’t do this anymore, “are you gonna go to Min’s party today?”

“Yes,” Kihyun stuttered from the surprise of Hoseok’s hand on his, “are you...going?”

“Yes, see you there then, Kihyunnie,” Hoseok said, sounding cheerful.

“See you hyung.” 

Kihyun took a last look at him before going. God, he missed him.

It was time for Minhyuk’s party. Kihyun was so nervous about meeting Hoseok again, even if he had already seen him that day, he felt just the way he had when he first met him, all the butterflies were there again. He was already in front of Minhyuk’s front door, trying to must up the courage to open it. He was early but he could hear the loud music already. Minhyuk always had what he called pre-parties, with himself.

Kihyun was so immersed in his thoughts that he didn’t even realize someone was coming up in the hallway.

“Kihyunnie? You’re early too!”

Kihyun jumped, feeling startled.

“Hyung!,” His voice cracked for a second.

“Oh, I’m sorry Kihyun, did I scare you?” Hoseok said, placing a hand on his shoulder.

“No, no, I was just…,” Hoseok gave him a knowing look, smirking.

“Yes you did, shut up, let’s get inside,” Kihyun said while putting the code to enter the apartment, secretly hoping Hoseok wouldn’t take his hand off his shoulder.

When they got inside the hand was gone and they were instantly pulled into Minhyuk’s antics.

“Kihyun! Hoseok hyung!? You got here together?”

“No!” They both shouted at the same time.

“You two are so funny you know?” Minhyuk said laughing and not clarifying why they were so funny.

“Hyung, can you get some ice in the kitchen? My glass is empty, please” Minhyuk put on his best puppy eyes.

“Yes, but only because you ‘re giving me this look, you know I’m too soft, this is cheating.”

“I know and I will continue to use my powers.”

Hoseok started to walk to the kitchen, laughing, “Lee Minhyuk, you’re insufferable.”

As soon as Hoseok was out of the living room Minhyuk started to wink and smirk at Kihyun.

“So...you really didn’t come together?”

“No, Min, we really didn’t...don’t look at me like that, stop,” Kihyun pushed him lightly on the shoulder.

“I didn’t even say anything.” The smirk was still there.

“No, but you’re thinking loud, I can hear it from here. We’re not gonna get back together just because we’re talking again, I mean, he’s...he probably has someone already.”

“Did he said that?” Minhyuk arched one brow, looking puzzled.

“No, but...he’s coming back, stop being obvious.”

“As you wish, lovebird.”

“Minhyuk!!!” Kihyun said in exasperation.

“Here Min, your ice…,” Hoseok looked away from Mihyuk, focusing on Kihyun, “why does Kihyun look like he’s going to explode? 

Hoseok sounded amused, knowing too well that Minhyuk was teasing him for some reason.

“Oh nothing, you know our Kiki, he can’t win against me.” Kihyun gave him a warning look. Minhyuk loved to tease his members but he knew the right time to stop. He knew that whatever was happening between them would be resolved, they always did it in the end.

“No one can win against you, Minhyuk,” Hoseok said smiling, he was used to Minhyuk’s antics from so many years of friendship and work together.

“You have a point,” Minhyuk said while walking to the door because other people were starting to show up.

The party was pretty full one hour later. The rest of the group was there too, gravitating around each other, after all these years they couldn’t get enough of each other, even with a room full of people. From the beginning of their career, their fans always spoke with pride of how close they were. And they were right. The world felt right when the 7 of them were together.

Eventually, there was just Kihyun and Hoseok talking to each other, they didn’t even notice the lack of other voices around them, lost in their own world.

“Hyung?”

“Yeah?, Hoseok stopped the bottle of beer that was halfway to his mouth.

“Remember that when we got tired of being around so many people in Min’s parties we would go exploring and find the quietest place we could and end the night there like…”

“Like there wasn’t anyone else around...yes I remember, how could I forget our eternal dance around each other”, Hoseok said with a bittersweet smile, that didn’t go unnoticed by Kihyun.

“Do you wish we had got together earlier than we did?”. Kihyun didn’t know why he was asking that, it was no use regretting the past, but part of him wanted to know everything he could about Hoseok’s point of view of their relationship.

“Sometimes...but being friends with you was just as good, I just wanted to have you in my life, it didn’t matter the relationship we had.”

They stayed silent for a moment. Kihyun thought that he had never met someone as selfless a Hoseok.

“Do you want to do it again?”

“Do what? Kihyun said, startled from his thoughts.

Hoseok smiled.

“Find somewhere quiet silly.”

“Oh right, we could do that.”

“This time without dancing.”

“Yeah, there's no dance this time.”

They looked at each other, smiling softly.

Anyone that looked at them at that moment would say there was definitely some dance going on.

They ended up in Minhyuk’s backyard, there was no one there because the door that gave access to it was locked (they both knew where Minhyuk stashed his keys). They sat on a big grey sofa with a certain distance from each other and looked up. The sky was clear that night, they could see every single star, which was unusual for Seoul.

“The sky looks so beautiful today, don’t you think?”

“It does.”

The sky was beautiful but Kihyun was fighting himself to not stare at Hoseok instead of the starry night. He looked down to the sofa and noticed their hands were very close to each other, he was so engrossed in the moment that he didn’t hesitate to put his hand on Hoseok’s hand.

Hoseok looked down to their entwined hands and then up, looking at the face that was his home for so many years.

“Are you ok with this?” Kihyun asked, fearing he had overstepped their recent reconnection.

“More than ok.” Kihyun started caressing his hand, an old habit, difficult to stop whenever Hoseok’s hands were on his. Hoseok closed his eyes. Kihyun, knowing him better than most people, knew this gesture always relaxed him. 

Hoseok sighed and opened up his eyes after some time of letting himself feel Kihyun’s hand. He looked up to Kihyun, suddenly looking like he was in pain. Before Kihyun could ask what was wrong he felt Hoseok’s lips on his and everything on his mind went away, the only thing he could think of was the softness of Hoseok’s lips on his, the familiar dance their lips were used to not too long ago. It was so easy to fall back into that rhythm, their tongues finally meeting, causing a shiver going down to his spine, into his whole body. They got lost in each other for a few minutes. Hoseok’s hand eventually went to Kihyun’s neck, gripping him in a way only he could, with strength and daintiness at the same time.

They parted when they could not breathe anymore, not really wanting to stop touching any way they could, afraid of what finally breathing could mean to them. When they were lost into each other everything was ok, but waking up meant a conversation neither of them wanted to have. Everything was so fragile at that moment, even the air around them seemed to have stopped for a moment, waiting for them, for the magic they created together to go on as it should be.

Kihyun was the first to break the silence.

“Hyung, I missed this, I don’t..”, Kihyun said, touching his lips, remembering the sensation of Hoseok’s lips on his from just moments ago and stopping mid-sentence. Kihyun saw once again this look of pain in Hoseok’s eyes, he wanted to get rid of it and make him smile again, it pained him to think he might be the one causing it, it pained him that Hoseok wasn’t looking at him.

“Ki...I’m so sorry.” Hoseok said, looking directly at him for the first time since they stopped kissing.

“Why are you sorry?” Kihyun asked sounding a little sharp, not because he was annoyed at Hoseok, but because at the moment, as he was sitting right there with the love of his life, he couldn’t see why he should be sorry.

“Because I kissed you...actually, I’m not sorry about that, I should be because I made you suffer for all these years, but I can’t find the strength in myself to be sorry for touching, for being here with you, I want to be here, and for that, for not wanting to be away from you, I’m sorry.”

Hoseok didn’t take his eyes off Kihyun while he poured his heart out, in a painful burst of words that he knew he could not take back. At that moment he decided to have courage, to say what his heart wanted to or he would regret it for the rest of his life. He knew he would.

“And you know what Kihyunie? This might be a mistake but I don’t know if I’ll have another chance to say all of it. You are love to me, you have always been. I cannot for the love of me think about anything else, there’s no other answer to me and I’m sorry if I’m scaring you, I don’t expect you will take me back like nothing ever happened or that you love me, no, I would never ask that of you, but I need you to know you are the one for me, and loving you has been the best thing I have done in my life, all my happy memories are with you and all my sad ones too, you are part of me in a way I can’t even put into words, I love you, I’m sorry, but I love you.”

Hoseok started crying, letting himself go completely, letting his head fall into his lap, knowing that from this moment forward everything would change, one way or another, but at least he would know that he said the truth and maybe that would have to be enough.

“Hyung no, please don’t cry”, Kihyun said, starting to cry himself, as hard as Hoseok was crying. He felt in total disbelief at what he had heard, his heart was full of love waiting to explode from how much he loved the man in front of him.

“How could I ever stop loving you? It’s impossible...that never happened, not even for a second, not even when I was the maddest at you, not when I was the most hurt, I couldn’t...I can’t take out everything I feel for you...Hoseokie please...look at me, please”, Kihyun gently touched his chin, lifting his head and looking into his red eyes from the crying.

“We will have to build our relationship again but I want to be with you, the idea of being apart from you again kills me, It really...I can’t stand it and If you want I want to try again, I know we’re not the same anymore, but in my heart I know I will love every version of you and we will learn to be again, like we always did, as best friends and as boyfriends, we were always a team and yes it still hurts to know that you decided that we couldn’t be that two years ago, but god, I am ready to talk about it as much as we need to and solve our issues but right now I just wanna be in your arms, as cheesy as that sounds and you know I’m not as good at that as you, I want to be brave with you, that’s all I ever needed.”

At that moment there was nothing else either of them could say so they just hugged and cried together. They had hugged since they met again but that hug, in the starry night, was special. It was the beginning of their second chance. The beginning of letting their love shine, like it was supposed to. They hugged for a long time, crying and repeating “I love you’s” again and again, because they missed saying those words to each other, they missed saying it and knowing it was the most unquestionable words the universe had ever heard. Hoseok and Kihyun loved each other and that was the most powerful thing they had ever known and they were ready to linger in that love.

Backyard scene in Changkyun’s pov:

Changkyun was looking for Hoseok. He was a little tipsy from something Minhyuk had offered him that had a sweet taste he couldn't identify, but he remembered he wanted to ask his hyung about a song he was writing. He looked everywhere until he found the last place he hadn’t looked before, the backyard. He opened the door with a light pull, not wanting to bother if there were other people there. The second his eyes caught the two people that were there he knew it was Kihyun and Hoseok. He looked for a few moments to make sure everything was alright, that they were not fighting or anything like that. 

They were crying, but he didn’t feel worried, the scene before his eyes suddenly reminded him of another time he caught them hugging and crying together, a long time ago, when they were all so young. They looked like that tonight, like they did most of the times they were together, like they belonged. He could hear faint “I love you’s” from afar. He didn’t know the details of what was going on between them, but he knew his hyungs like the back of his hand after so many years and he just knew right then and there that they would be alright. He got out of there trying to not make much noise - with a smile on his face - saying to himself, with a slight drunk voice, “I can’t wait to tell Minhyuk hyung”.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's the end but not really, there's a bonus chapter.   
> Kiki and Hoseok are happy again, all is right in the world.
> 
> Hope you enjoyed their little journey back to each other.


	3. Epilogue: Happy husbands

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Essentially, they are married and have sex.  
> It's very explicit, so if you don't like this type of content i'd advise against reading this chapter. It doesn't change anything about the 2 chapters before so it's possible to skip it.

**2 YEARS LATER**

“Kihyun!!! Go back to bed baby!”

“I have to go to the studio and record all the songs I wrote about you, stop tempting me”.

“If you go back you can have more inspiration for your songs, I promise you”, Hoseok said, winking at him with that playful smile Kihyun knew so well.

“Stop! You know I can’t resist you, this is so unfair”.

“Unfair, yeah? Ok, Kihyunie, guess I will just put all my clothes back on and get on with my day, my husband needs to work, he has no time for me”, Hoseok fake pouted, holding his laughter.

“No! You will not!” Kihyun came running from the bathroom and threw himself in the bed, hugging Hoseok from behind and putting his head on his shoulder.

“Why do you do this to me?”

“Do what?” Hoseok smirked, pretending he didn’t know what he was talking about.

“Make me want you all the time, think about you all the time, I need more than 24 hours a day to think about other things”.

“Oh so I’m hogging your thoughts, I’m so special, your husband must be so jealous of me”.

“Oh god, I have a comedian as my husband? No, I didn’t sign up for that”, Kihyun said laughing.

“You do, you said, in sickness, in health, and bad jokes, I know, I was there.”

“Oh yeah? You were? So you know what happened that night, huh?” Kihyun said, changing his voice to a more whispered one and doing a little bit of friction with his fully clothed crotch to Hoseok’s naked ass.

“Hmm, yeah? Wanna repeat that babe?” Hoseok closed his eyes, starting to feel Kihyun’s cock, through his clothes. Even after so many years, they were quick to get heated with each other, they only needed a spark to explode.

“Uhum, wanna eat you out so good before I go sing, only you and I will know where my mouth was right before I belt those notes, won’t you like that hyung?”

“Yes, hmm, please, only you and I”. Kihyun kept going with the delicious friction until he felt Hoseok’s hand going for his zipper, trying to open it.

“Eager, are we?” Kihyun smirked and kissed his neck sucking a little bit, making Hoseok moan faintly. He held Hoseok's hand right above his cock, without letting him move, knowing that would make him go crazier for him.

“Always. Always eager for you.”

“Ok, ok I will take my pants, but only because you want to”.

“Yeah right, you love my ass too much to lose the opportunit-”, Kihyun thrust in his hand, making him feel his growing erection.

“Fuck...wanna feel you.” Kihyun couldn’t wait anymore and started to take off his pants and underwear in one go, as eager as Hoseok to feel the skin on skin.

He gave a final push to his clothes and came back to feel Hoseok’s ass on him, it never failed to make him completely crazy.

“God, I wanna ruin you, spend all day worshipping that ass”, he said while squeezing Hoseok’s ass strongly just how he liked, spreading his ass cheeks and putting his erection on the rim of Hoseok’s asshole, without making a move.

“Ki, please do something, you’re teasing me.”

“Ok Hoseokie, but you have to choose, do you want my cock or my mouth?”, Kihyun said as he bit his neck lazily.

Hoseok groaned, feeling his own erection growing and asking for attention.

“Both, anything…”, Hoseok said, moving towards Kihyun’s cock with desperation, making Kihyun groan himself and stop the game of push and pull and finally doing what he wanted to do since he woke up this morning. He started to kiss Hoseok’s neck, slowly tracing from there to his back, kissing his back muscles one by one, worshipping him like he deserved, like he wanted to do for the rest of his life, remembering that only him could kiss Hoseok’s entire body, only him loved Hoseok like that.

He kept going down his back until he got to his favorite part of Hoseok’s body, his ass, God, if he could he would worship his ass every hour of every day. It was so firm and nice to look at, and even nicer to touch. He put both of his hands on the ass cheeks, parting it and finally licking his rim, making Hoseok moan loudly.

“More, more Ki…”, Hoseok said and Kihyun was happy to provide.

“Put your ass up for me babe, I’m gonna make you feel good.”

Hoseok changed his position, laying his head on a pillow and putting his ass up just how his husband had asked.

“Yes...God, you look so good, I was out of my mind when I thought I could go out without touching you.”

“Hmm, all for your Kihyunie.” Hoseok said shaking his ass slightly.

Kihyun didn’t waste time, he got the lube they always had in their bedside table and left it by his side for when he needed it.

Kihyun parted his ass cheeks again and started to lick his rim more eagerly, spit going everywhere. Hoseok started to shake his ass in Kihyun’s face asking for him to go deeper with his tongue, which Kihyun did, moving his tongue in a way he knew drove Hoseok crazy.

“Hmm, want your fingers, please, deeper…”, Hoseok said half moaning, half talking.

They knew each other so well, Kihyun knew he would ask for fingers after some time, desperate for the feeling of having more and more from Kihyun. He knew that feeling, he felt the same. Kihyun always wanted more, he wanted everything Hoseok could and wanted to give to him. They knew even without words.

Kihyun got the lube that was by his side, coated generously one of his fingers and started to put in slowly, always looking for Hoseok’s eyes to know if it was ok, after so many years they knew the right way to communicate with each other, sex was not only physical pleasure to them, it was the moment their bodies felt as one, as something so intricate and full of love and euphoria. They touched every part of each other’s bodies as it was their most precious possession and it really was. 

He kept twisting his finger, looking for his most sensitive spot, pushing in and out, making the thrust motion Hoseok loved so much, until he felt Hoseok could take more. He took his finger out and looked at Hoseok, who was panting and sweating, who only nodded in his direction. Kihyun put more lube and used three fingers this time, slowly making his way inside him, put one by one, until Hoseok was used to the feeling and asking him to please move.

Kihyun started to do the same motion he was doing before, but now much more full, he felt his cock leaking, from doing this to Hoseok, from feeling him all over his fingers. He felt like he could come only from this, as he did on other occasions before. He looked down at his husband and saw Hoseok completely lost to the pleasure, thrusting into his fingers, while he pumped his cock with one of his hands. He looked so hot, Kihyun could barely handle the sight before his eyes.

“Kihyunie, please, I’m so close, wanna come together, wanna feel your cock on mine.”

Kihyun didn’t need to be asked twice. He let Hoseok take control - they loved giving and taking control from each other, it was one of the things they learned with years of experiencing each other’s bodies - and manhandle him to open his legs and put them on top of Hoseok’s legs so their cocks could be as close as possible. As soon as they got into position they joined their cocks, and started to pump them at the same time, not knowing which was who’s, only feeling that powerful sensation together. They started to kiss messily, following the rhythm of their swelling cocks, not caring about kissing properly, just wanting to feel each other in any way possible, as they took themselves to a climax, feeling the euphoric sensation they were so used to but the never got tired of, they finished seconds apart, stopping the kissing and moaning loudly with their eyes fixed on each other not wanting to miss a thing, shaking as they felt every part of their body react, it was heaven on earth.

When their breathing calmed down, they hugged, kissing each other’s cheeks and all over their faces, then going for little kisses on the neck, just enjoying being together, not caring about the stickiness in the middle of them for a second. This moment right after they orgasmed was one of their favorites, it was pure bliss, love, and pleasure, all mixed.

Hoseok was the one who broke the moment, he had to, his husband did need to work.

“Babe, Kihyunie…”, he caressed his face, and then his hair, gently pulling it from his face, “You have to go to work, remember?”. He said smiling gently.

“Oh fuck, yeah, I really need to...you make me forget everything,” Kihyun said as he gave Hoseok a light slap to his back.

“Not my fault you can't resist me,” Hoseok said, giving him his tongue playfully.

Kihyun looked into his eyes, getting serious for a moment.

“Yeah, I can't resist you and I don’t want to, never want to be apart from you”.

Hoseok, as he always did, understood his husband’s need to show his feelings, to be vulnerable in a way he never was with anyone, even with his closest friends.

“Never want to be apart from you too Kihyunie. One time I said to you that you are love to me and that has been the truth for every year since I met you,” Hoseok took one of Kihyun’s hands, giving a gentle kiss between his knuckles, “you make me feel alive and more loved than I could ever imagine when I was younger, thank you for being with me and being part of me.”

Kihyun kept looking at him while he talked with love so apparent in his eyes someone could see it from miles afar.

“I’m so lucky to have you Hoseokie, God, you’re so..” He hugged Hoseok as tight as he could and whispered what the whole universe knew from the moment they met.

“I love you.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's really the end now. Thank you to anyone that read till now, I love you.


End file.
